Don’t Breathe (2016) Movie Review

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Stephen Lang made me feel like I was doing wrong by just watching this shit occur.

Don’t Breathe tells the story of a group of young hooligans who like robbing people’s homes. Dylan Minnette, star of the completely-snubbed-for-the-Academy-Award Goosebumps (2015), portrays the character who doesn’t really have a good feeling about thisJane Levy portrays the I have to do this because I gotta get out of my completely fucked up life character. Daniel Zovatto portrays the I gotta do this because cash rules everything around me CREAM. An aspect to Don’t Breathe I truly appreciated was although the main characters are somewhat caricatures we’re used to seeing, they are written and executed in a way that makes you have a genuine care for them. I thought I would become bored of them as the movie progressed since the beginning of the film sets them up so exact as to what kind of character they are, however understanding certain characters’ motives made it for an enjoyable watch since you do want to see them succeed at defeating the antagonist… Which happens to be the blind veteran man they wanted to rob… I love feeling conflicted when watching movies because it makes me think of the ethical repercussions of feeling that way.

Me: How dare they think of bothering that poor helpless man?! They deserve what is coming to them… Ohhhhh wait… I kind of want to see them steal all his money and hurt him but I also don’t…

Now I love me some contained thrillers (see: 10 Cloverfield Lane) and one of my favourite movies this year that I have been raving about to anyone who will listen was Husha horror movie about a man tormenting a woman who is deaf. I also love the Audrey Hepburn classic Wait Until Dark (1967) wherein a group of thugs torment a blind woman for a heroin-stuffed doll. Essentially, I like movies where a character is suffering from an ailment that impairs one of their main senses and it takes place in enclosed spaces and short periods of time…

There’s No Need to Be Upset

I am happy to say Don’t Breathe has officially fallen into my favourite above mentioned category. This is one tense thrill-ride that starts around twenty or so minutes in and persists until the beginning of the final credits. I watched this in a packed theatre and it was one of the most fun theatre experiences I have ever had, if you are able to watch this in a movie theatre with a bunch of first-time watchers I would highly recommend it. You and your audience will feel an immediate connection because of the way it is filmed, there are occasional bouts of incredibly uncomfortable close-ups and sequences where you are quite literally bracing yourself for what is coming next. There are jump scares however they are executed not shittily!! Hooray for non-shitty jump scares! Let me tell you, there were one or two sequences where the entire audience was absolutely silent for, the sounds of popcorn chewing and Slushie slurping completely ceased because we were all invested as to what is going to happen next.

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The core group portrayed their roles just fine with the particular standouts being Levy, who I found played Rocky incredibly well and holy dickens, guys watch this movie alone for Stephen Lang‘s performance as the Blind Man. In terms of fantastic horror characters of the modern world, Lang absolutely nails it as a disturbingly strong older man whose hair is full of secrets! Minnette really had two emotions throughout the movie which consisted of stoneface & wide-eyes McGee and MILD SPOILER Zovatto’s character ejacultaes on the floor of a house they rob in the beginning of the movie so that says it all about his character and what he had to work with. END SPOILER.

There were a number of incredibly suspenseful moments where I genuinely had no idea what was going to happen next, which is nice to experience in specifically a horror film since the main point of horror is to cause you discomfort & fear and it is kind of difficult to accomplish that if you can call what is going to happen at every turn. I will say, there were a couple obvious guns of Chekhov’s sprinkled throughout and shots that lingered just a wee bit longer than they should have. I did appreciate that they never really deviated from the situation occurring at the house and that various scares actually added on to the progression and execution of the plot rather than simply being there for those BOOMWHUPPAH! moments… And with a runtime of just an hour and a half, the filmmakers managed to create a lovely suspenseful tale that makes me happy I do not rob homes for a living. 

If you’re looking for a horror movie that will make you feel genuinely frightened and also make you say the occasional “what… the… fuck check out Don’t Breathe.

Don’t Breathe receives 4/5 Matt Damon heads.


10 Cloverfield Lane (2016) Movie Review



Building explosion and super duper action power-packed sequel to Cloverfield (2008), this is not.

One of my favourite genres of film are those that take place in confined spaces and/or those that are under incredible time-constraints.

  • Similarly to the jurors of 12 Angry Men (1957) that had to deal with their prejudices and preconceived notions in a stuffy room.
  • To George & Martha of Who’s Afraid of Virgina Woolf? (1966) facing their insecurities & fear in the eyes of a youthful couple in the middle of the night.
  • To the gang of The Warriors (1979) navigating through the NY Subway System at 3 in the morning, fearing for their lives from wacky, murder-hungry gangs in the streets of New York.
  • To a wheelchair-bound man who refuses to mind his own business and has an incredibly beautiful (completely out of his league) girlfriend in Rear Window (1954)…
I love you, J. Stewart, but there’s no way he was ready for her jelly


These types of films have been some of my favourites because of the sense of urgency and complete lack of control characters have throughout them. The original Cloverfield (2008) scared many with their viral marketing and take on found-footage, before it was done ad nauseam and even more nauseam than that. cough paranormal activities cough.


I surprisingly enjoyed 10 Cloverfield Lane even though I wasn’t that huge a fan of Cloverfieldhowever even if you’ve never even heard of the “original”, there’s no need to fret! Let me just say, the Cloverfield name was shoehorned into this. Take out the name and this movie is one of the best contained thrillers I’ve seen in the past few years.
I really wish they took more of a Take Shelter (2011) route and created a new addition to the contained thriller genre than utilizing the name of a brand this movie had nothing to do with, save the last few moments of the third act.

This movie is incredibly suspenseful and tense. Good god man, if there was an Oscar for antagonist performances, John Goodman’s Harold ranks up there with Tom Hardy’s Fitzgerald in the favourite last year, The Revenant. The performances in general are done really well, particularly the relationship between Mary Elizabeth Winstead’s Michelle and Harold. The secondary character of Emmett played by John Gallagher Jr. was fine and I think it’s just a testament to Winstead’s acting ability that she worked so well with the two. I really want to restrict inadvertently mentioning any spoilers so I will say the dynamic between the three was fantastic. Filming in confined quarters challenges an actor’s ability on what they can work with since it’s only them for long periods of times. Dan Trachtenberg’s direction (debut direction!) managed to achieve a great dynamic between the main group and creates an atmosphere of sheer uncomfortability (not a word) throughout it.

I, uh… didn’t need the bathroom anyway..

I’m not sure if this was because of the theatre I was in or what, but the score really was overpowering at times. The occasional musical pieces that accompanied the movie added some tension but there were moments where I had to think, “ALRIGHT! Cool it a bit, please!” The soundtrack though… I loved the song choices. There were occasional moments of humour that made me chuckle aloud, and immediately made me regret feeling happy for a moment. The sense of uncertainty this movie possesses is insane, I felt entirely comfortable one minute and the next I had no idea why I allowed myself to think I was safe. I need to just never use my brain again.

If you’re looking for the official sequel of Cloverfield, 10 Cloverfield Lane, it is not.
If you’re looking for a thriller with characters that don’t make you shake your head by their stupidity set in confined quarters with an incredibly layered & complex antagonist, check out 10 Cloverfield Lane.

10 Cloverfield Lane receives 4/5 Matt Damon heads.