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The Revenant, or as I like to call it, WHY WON’T YOU DIE?: The Movie.


This movie is an experience and a half. From the moment I first heard about what this story was about (wait.. he’s left for dead in the forest after BEING MAULED BY A BEAR?!) to the second those credits roll, the story of Hugh Glass is something that blows the mind when realizing just how strong one’s devotion to survival can be.

Let’s get one thing straight: The Revenant is one gorgeous looking movie. The director/cinematographer pairing of Iñárritu and Lubezki is slowly becoming one of my favourites, following their collaboration on 2014’s Best Picture winner Birdman, and I think 0 people are surprised they have the nomination for this year’s Best Picture as well. It’s difficult to deny just how incredible some of these shots are and watching the movie for the cinematography alone would be a worth a watch.

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Now the acting… Is Leo going to get that little, coveted & revered golden bastard? That man has been on a whirlwind of press tours to promote this movie and, subsequently, promoting his performance. DiCap did a tremendous job portraying a man at the brink of death almost every other second… Leo will win this year. His portrayal of Glass is gritty, real, graphic, disturbing, basically any synonym of “batshit crazy”… Is this his greatest performance of his career? My personal opinion is this: It’s not his best and, not taking away from anything Leo did because he was fantastic, I truly believe Fassbender should win this year. Guys, you know who was insane? Tom.. Motherf’ing.. Hardy. God is there anything that man can’t do?? His portrayal of Fitzgerald is one of the best “villain” performances of recent memory and you know what the greatest sign of a terrific antagonist is? Someone who makes the viewer see his/her side… And let me tell you: I found myself agreeing with him multiple times after placing myself in his shoes and that’s simply bananas.

The Revenant clocks in at little over 2 and a half hours yet everyone in my theatre was enthralled throughout it. Honestly, to get the most enjoyment out of this film would be to watch it on the biggest of screens you can find. There are certain aspects to the movie that did make me go “huh?” a couple of times and man, there were times I struggled a bit on trying to decipher what some characters were saying because evidently enunciation wasn’t a thing in the 1800’s! I also needed a warm shower after watching it with a ton of nice, clean soap so if anything, the movie made me appreciate the little things.


If you’re looking for a movie with a stellar cast, absolutely gorgeous cinematography and have a few hours to really sit down and soak up the world of The Revenant, do yourself a favour and see why everyone is shipping the Bear + Leo.

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The Revenant receives 4/5 Matt Damon heads.

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