Star Wars Episode VII: AWAKENED, THE FORCE HAS (2015) Spoiler-Free review

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The time has arrived. The wait is finally over. The new Star Wars is here… A NEW STAR WARS!  From the moment Disney bought Lucasfilm and the announcement was made that we’re ultimately going to be sucked back into the movie universe that so many of us love, speculations, leaks, criticisms, fanboyisms have all risen with the first ultimate test being how The Force Awakens stacks up… And let me tell you guys: Episode VII is one incredible ride.


Let’s get the pleasantries out of the way. The second that opening crawl comes up with NEW words and sentences you’ve never read before, emotions are high. Tears are shed. Snot is formed. 

I haven’t been enthralled in such a movie since watching my favourite film of the year, Fury Road. Each frame is filled with beauty, lushness, colour and familiarity (that is for you to see) that makes it such a comfortable movie to watch. It is the mashed potatoes of movies. You’re welcomed back into the Star Wars universe that you love and have been craving to be welcomed back into. I’m going to focus on the merits and negatives to The Force Awakens strictly for itself but mention of the Original Trilogy and Prequels will be made, it’s inevitable. That said, it’s fucking PARSECS ahead of the Prequels, don’t worry about that.

I’ve read a few people saying the story/plot in the Prequels are stronger than that of The Force Awakens and it’s really like WHAT. Look, the main plot that drives TFA is reminiscent of A New Hope… Alright let’s call a spade a spade, without delving too much into spoiler territory Force Awakens is essentially an updated, more bad-ass version of ANH. There are many familiar themes in Episode VII that parallels the previous Episode, however, JJ Abrams & co. have managed to shape it in a way that makes it entertaining and fresh. Trade negotiations & senate meetings are terrific and you know what? I would have liked for TFA to have a bit more explanation of the political climate in the galaxy and certain characters certainly could have been utilized better. I’m sure we’ll receive more from all accounts in the upcoming episodes.. BECAUSE WE’RE GOING TO GET MORE STAR WARS MOTHERFUCKAHHHHHS 🙂


Let’s discuss the newcomers to the Star Wars universe…

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Boyega, Ridley, Driver, Isaac… They are simply terrific. Daisy Ridley and John Boyega.. these two are going places.
  • Ridley as Rey is arguably the breakthrough performance of the year. I can’t imagine the amount of pressure this woman had to a) not only star in the new Star Wars in a decade but also b) in her first big, blockbuster film! Yeah, I get nervous pouring coffee for my manager.
  • Boyega as FN-2187 (aka Finn) is spectacular. The perfect blend of Han Solo & Luke Skywalker, the chemistry between these two leads is undeniable. 
  • Oscar Isaac (Poe Dameron) is one of my favourite actors working today. He is in the realm of the Hardy and Fassbenders. I honestly felt more of a genuine friendship between Poe & Finn in the first 5 minutes of them meeting than  Obi Wan & Anakin’s friendship in the entirety of Attack of the Clones. I’m sorry but no one gives a shit about the time you flew into the pile of Gungans on the island of Gundor.
  • Arguably the weakest link between the four is Adam Driver as Kylo Ren. While masked, he possessed a certain air of mystery and intrigue to him… I just didn’t feel intimated by him at all when that mask came off. This could have been achieved as well unmasked had a stronger actor been cast. Not to take away from Driver’s acting ability but I couldn’t help but wonder how Isaac would have been as Kylo. 

    You all have looked up how good or bad The Force Awakens is. You know whether you want to experience it on the biggest of screens or in the comfort of your own home, although I’m sure you’d be spoiled eventually because internet bags of dicks are everywhere. It is not a perfect movie, however it’s pretty darn close to it. All I can tell you is if you’re familiar with the Star Wars universe, you will feel a sense of awe throughout the duration of the movie. If you’re not a fan of the universe, you’ll be insanely entertained throughout it… However, at the very least watch Episode IV: A New Hope. You’ll find a new favourite movie and have a greater appreciation for The Force Awakens.

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I am way too hyped for the remaining two of this chart to be filled

If you’re looking for a movie that– ahhh fuck it. GO WATCH THE NEW STAR WARS! 🙂


Star Wars: The Force Awakens receives 4/5 Matt Damon heads.

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The Night Before (2015) Movie Review

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I rarely go into movies completely blind. For the last 3 weeks after moving into our new place, I was completely Internet and TV-less so I was barely able to check up on any movie news, releases and the like. A good friend of mine asked if I wanted to see this new movie starring Seth Rogen and one of my fantasy husbands Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Figured I like the two so why not?!

… I went into The Night Before completely blind and came out with the biggest smile on my face it hurt. Guys, I adored this movie.

JGL can honestly charm the pants off a mannequin. Seth Rogen had me cracking up throughout the film. Anthony Mackie was fantastic. The chemistry between these 3 was just something else, I truly believed they were the best of friends. Every secondary character served a purpose and did not feel like dead weight.. It’s a miracle to spot that in a comedy!

Lizzy Caplan makes me a happy camper and HO BOY the character of Josh was spectacular. The standout for me, and I believe many others, had to have been Michael Shannon.. The mysterious “quiet intensity” this man possesses is bone-chilling and made me uncomfortable yet at ease every time he was on screen.. shannon

*Side note:* and honestly, I felt more love between Diana & Ethan for 10 minutes moreso than the entire relationship between Bond & Swann in Spectre.. But that is for another review.

Besides all the characters that were actually developed.. The writing of this movie was surprisingly incredible. Everything connected, there was virtually no wasted plot because every single piece of dialogue served its purpose. There were also way too many times I felt things I did not expect to feel, my friends. Labeling it strictly as a “stoner comedy” does it an injustice.. A 16 year old slacker can enjoy this film just as much as a 36 year old housewife can, however they may love it for different reasons which shows that it can truly transcend audiences.

Besides a few glaring lapses of logic that made me go HAH?? (yes.. I’m aware it’s a movie but don’t tell me these guys honestly thought they could pull off that Goldeneye moment) The Night Before delivers in the greatest way possible.. It made me laugh hard in one minute and warm my heart the next. If you’re looking for a particular film like that, PLEASE check out The Night Before. It is a beautifully made R-rated comedy perfect for a hilarious night out with friends. Cannot recommend it enough.


The Night Before receives 4.5/5 Matt Damon heads.

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